Phony proposal plan is juvenile

Hi, Carolyn:

My fiance's close friend always complains that his girlfriend picks ridiculous fights and escalates everyday issues into big dramatic episodes. This is supposedly because she's insecure about the relationship, but I find her a very cool, interesting person and him nice but neurotic.

Fiance's theory is she's erratic and craves drama and his friend is just inexperienced; my theory is they're not compatible and need to break up, end of story.

Now Fiance tells me he advised his friend to propose as a way to "test" whether she's truly insecure or just crazy (and then break off the engagement if it's established that she's just crazy). I told him I think the idea is absurd and will end badly ... they will probably get married regardless.

I genuinely like this girl, and I've seen no signs of her alleged "crazy" behavior. Obviously I can't tell her what they're planning, but do I have some obligation here, or do I just wait for the impending disaster?

— Meddling

You've got an impending disaster of your own to wait for, since it's generally not advisable to marry the cutest guy you meet in a middle school cafeteria.

Propose to her? As a test? And if he retracts the proposal, what's he planning to say — "Psych!"?

OK, you called the idea "absurd." But that's hardly strong enough. It's not just a juvenile thing he suggested, but also breath-taking in its cruelty.

And, pardon my pragmatism at a time like this, it won't even work. No matter what her emotional failing, be it insecurity, instability or just lousy taste in men, it won't be magically erased by a proposal. The one person cured of insecurity by engagement was last seen knocking back champagne cocktails with the Loch Ness Monster, Jimmy Hoffa and Waldo.

So. Here's one way to look at this nasty bit of business: The only one of this quartet mature enough to get married is the one who says, "Wow, anyone who could seriously entertain that idea is so not ready for marriage."

(Do the math — no one here gets married. Psych!)

Write to Carolyn Hax, care of Boston Herald, P.O. Box 55843, Boston, MA 02205; email her at tellme@washpost.com.

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TALK: Taylor Swift & Justin Bieber "Baby" LIVE

Taylor Swift & Justin Bieber "Baby" LIVE yep so Taylor Swift & Justin Bieber "Baby" LIVE video is a HOAX.. not really I just wanted to say that. But all jokes aside the OC fair is pretty darn close but I don't know what the big fuss about the surprises are about.. first the wedding he showed up at and now this.. before we had the water bottle which turned out to be a shirt and candy and then macy's and what else could be next? Titles of the video I liked most about Justin Bieber Justin Bieber attacked at his Someday Perfume Lauch at Macy's NYC (Original) Justin Bieber Surprise at Selena Gomez Concert 7/24/11 OC Fair Taylor Swift & Justin Bieber "Baby" LIVE Link to the OC fair video www.youtube.com Click To Tweet My Video! clicktotweet.com So regarding Justin Bieber getting attacked at his Someday Perfume Lauch (launch) at Macy's NYC - were you there? What are your thoughts? Also, what would you do if JUSTIN BIEBER BEAT ME UP! Taylor Swift & Justin Bieber "Baby" LIVE Taylor Swift & Justin Bieber "Baby" LIVE WORLD IS ENDING! justin bieber rap dance taylor swift baby los angeles staples center california speak now world tour selena gomez

Video Rating: 2 / 5



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